I’m calm now

OK, I’ve taken my chill pill.

 

I’m not a moody person by nature, but the last week or so have been an emotional rollercoaster.  The ride is done and I can get back to business.

 

I’ve started my regular regimen at the gym again and preparing for my next tri, so that is helping me keep myself on an even keel.  Why I let some things bother me…don’t know.  But I have seen the error of my ways and I will repent!

 

 

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UNBELIEVABLE…who’s the creep here?

I was hurt today.

I couldn’t believe what I was hearing.

 

I’ve been called many things (some were justified).  this wasn’t.  Not only was it not justified, it was veiled and not explained when uncovered.

Today I was called a creep.

 

Creep: someone unpleasantly strange or eccentric.

 

It was veiled in the following statements: 

"i do not feel comfortable with you right now, outside of work, period.  and i hope you respect that." 

 

When asked why and what it was exactly about me that made this person feel uncomfortable I got the following:

"i simply do not feel comfortable.hope you respect that. Thanks"

 

I feel like I have been the biggest fool of all time.  I put time, effort, money, and trust into this relationship (both personal AND professional) just BECAUSE I thought it was a good thing to do.  Didn’t ask for anything in return.  Didn’t expect anything except a rich friendship.  HA!  Somebody please peel the "L" off of my forehead. 

 

Exactly 3 weeks ago, we were fine.  2 weeks ago we were fine almost better.  1 week ago..things started going downhill and I was wondering why.  Questions like "What is going on?" were responded to thus:  "There’s nothing wrong on my end.  I’m OK.  I hope you are, too.  I don’t know what else to say".  and then "I don’t feel comfortable with you".  WTF!!?? 

 

I boost your career and we have a great time together after hours and now all of a sudden you don’t feel comfortable around me?

 

Fine.  OK.  No contact is the way you want to go (but you’ve got no guts to just say it–nor the guts to say what is going on).  We can do that. 

 

ME: so…we aren’t friends…just colleagues?

Person: for now, we are just colleagues

 

Have you read Lost Friend?  This one is Lost AGAIN; except this time…I ain’t going looking.  Stay lost.  FREAK.  

 

 

OMG…driving with kids…

OK..spent the Thanksgiving holiday with family and on the way home, driving
with four kids….somebody kill me please…

1400 miles….one of these rest stops…Im just gonna get out and walk by
myself…

Sent from my Windows Mobile device. Please excuse any terseness,it is solely
due to the input capabilities of the device.

Being Thankful

So another Thanksgiving Day has come and gone. 

It’s called Thanksgiving for a reason; and I missed that this year.

No, I had turkey, stuffing, being with family etc…but I *MISSED* the reason for the season.

 

Missed it completely.  Like a high-brow joke that I didn’t get.

I was so steeped in my own miseries and concerns that I probably committed the most heinous of all crimes (next to murder): Being Ungrateful/UnThankful

I was so selfish yesterday that reflection upon it almost brings me to tears of embarrassment.

It took a blog of an estranged friend (and I’m not really sure if that term is correct) to motivate me to write this entry.

 

I will probably continue the list for my New Year’s Eve message, but these people need to be thanked by me NOW for their impact:

 

Johnson Har –I’m calling you out by name.  You were there at a critical time and still are with me.  Thank you for your compassion when it couldn’t be found elsewhere.  Hong Kong will Rock!!

David Elfassy — You too.  The opportunities in 2007 have allowed me to extend opportunities to others.  Thank you

KRosen — I remember in 2005 on a boat in Amsterdam you and Ryan told me how cool it was to drink the Kool-Aid.  You were right. Thanks for the opportunity to do things I would not be doing right now if it hadn’t been for you.

JOleson— Thanks for recommending me to my current manager.  Have fun in the Caribbean.

BBaer — Thank you for your patience.  It’s not easy being my mentor.

DPuggie — I learned so much from you in such a short time.  Only MS was able to make me leave your team and I had other opps.  You are the perfect manager.  I mean it.  Perfect. 

Pepe Reyes — Me enseñaste de la importancia de ser agradecido…no aprendí bien.  Eres el mejor ejemplo para mi en ese aspecto.  Algun dia ojalá podria ser como tu.

DandABalter — Every time I speak at a conference I reflect on that day in 1992 when you changed my life.  Forever and ever will I be indebted to you.

DMelber — Thanks for your confidence and allowing me to redeem myself.  We need to talk; about…"stuff".

KREES — Por tu oído.  Tu amistad.  Tu comprensión.  Muchisimas gracias  Eres el mero mero.

MTNguyen — How ironic that it would be you to inspire me to be thankful.  Thanks!  Remember, you are unique (like everyone else) and there are TONS of people "like you"…just open your eyes.

 

There is a hymn called "When upon Life’s Billows you are Tempest Tossed"…it goes on to say "Count your blessings…name them one by one…count your many blessings see what God hath done".  The above list of people is a testament to that truth.  I could go on and on.  (Johnson…you’re right…maybe I am more sensitive than a guy should be LOL)

 

So as we gear up for the end of the year remember:  Be thankful!

 

 

Feelings and Moods are contagious

There was an ad on the Spaces page that said, "Happiness is contagious".  I sat and thought about that for a while; especially since I’m in a VERY crappy mood.  I do agree that happiness *can* be contagious, but so is Sadness; and much more so.

 

Several years ago I remember sitting in a training class with several colleagues and I was in a crappy mood.  I didn’t yell at anyone or even say anything to anyone.  I just sat in a funk.  After a couple of hours, the instructor came up to me privately and said, "Look, Taylor–I don’t know what has you down, but its REALLY bringing the class down.  You have an ability to inflict your mood upon people and you need to be aware of this."

 

Years later I see this.  Last night I am at a dinner in Barcelona and sitting next to a friend (Bill English).  I’m not feeling too hot and he turns to me and says, "What’s up, buddy?"  I lie and say that I was just tired; but I knew that I had to leave or pretty soon my whole table would be feeling the effects.  Now I am on my way home and have a new work week ahead of me.  It’s a good thing my office mate isn’t around very often or I’d be infecting him. 

 

Yes–I know, moods are a choice–and I’m choosing to be sad.  I find it to be no less than slightly hypocritical to act like you are happy when you are not.  Last time I felt like this was about 15 years ago…not pretty.

What’s the theme?

If only the sun
Were my sail
To lift me up
Into the blue,
Far, far away
From
This painful sea
Of frozen laughter.

Airport Ratings

It’s been a while since I’ve rated airports, possibly because I don’t and haven’t traveled nearly as much as I used to.  Some airports have definitely stepped up their "stuff", namely the Las Vegas airport (McCarran).  It used to get a C, but now it gets a B.  Mainly due to the fact that they outlawed smoking.  BRAVO!!   BRAVO!!  Now the airport doesn’t smell like a frickin ASHTRAY when you get off the plane.  PLUS they have added more WiFi access points making it a little easier to get online.  Still lacking in the electrical outlets, but hey–most airports are.

I’m am severely disappointed in SeaTAC.  You would think that the airport that services so many HiTech employees of companies such as MICROSOFT, and AMAZON and BOEING would deserve FREE WiFi access…but alas, it is not so.  SeaTAC gets a C-.

 

UPDATE:   JFK gets a D+.  The Airline clubs are where you have to go to have any comfort and there are plenty of AC outlets and internet connections.  But other than the clubs, JFK is an absolute DISGRACE.

UPDATE #2:  MSP gets a C-.  You’d better know where you’re going.  No signage anywhere.  In the terminal, there are NO OUTLETS!!!